My father always said I was a hippie
biker chick, a private joke between the
two of us, like the "Hannah
banana from Montana" joke he constantly says, smiling at
my feigned annoyance. I get my revenge by laughing
at him, when I'm not laughing with him at the world.
I suppose I am a product of my world
so I'll blame him for my hippie
tendencies. Still, some of the responsibility lies with my laughing
mother, the ubiquitous gentle presence in my life. The
next load of blame I lay at
my brothers' feet - the reasons I was called Ja-Hannah
or even Je-Hannah
in my childhood. They exposed me to their world
of music - at
home, or as we got older, at "hippie"
house shows showcasing folk and punk and other genres - the
urge to start laughing
stifled at being in the presence of so many older non-laughing
people. James and Jesse would introduce me as their little sister, Hannah
and I would smile and shake the
hand of another dreadlocked person - the ever expanding world
of my hippie
friends recorded at
home in my journal, late at
night after arriving back at the house, laughing
at my encounter with a hippie
or two. In the morning, my parents would ask "Hannah,
how was last night?" and I would tell them of my experiences in James' world
careful to leave out the
sordid details - with the
suspicion my father already knows and at
the same time, to spare my mother worry for James and his world.
Because when she's worried, she's no longer laughing
and we're her babies: James, Jesse, and Hannah,
and we're all a kind of hippie.
Hippie Hannah
Laughing at
the World
Baha that was AMAZING.
ReplyDeleteAnd I always wondered what a sestina was. (The dictionary definition makes no sense to the uninitiated.)
I love it. :)
ReplyDelete