Needing God

I recently had the revelation, well, not revelation, but the truth really hit home. That all of us, however put-together we seem on the outside, desperately need God's help, all the time. I have the privilege to be the confidant of several of my friends, and I was just thinking that several of them have communicated difficulties or crisis or big decisions that need to be made in their lives. And I was thinking that is was weird that so many of us are having issues at the same time. Then I realized that it's like this all the time, and all I could do was cry out to God and tell him how much I needed him, and how much my friends needed him. Because as loving as I am, my love can never, ever come close to the love that God has for my friends. And as much as I've supported my friends in problems before, I do not have the strength to hold all of them up by myself, no matter how hard I try. I get exhausted trying to hold up one of my friends at a time, and can't even try two. All I can do is cry out to God, and ask him to take over. Because I certainly can't save my friends, or resolve their problems. I fail, every time, I try. I can't even fix myself and my own problems. I am unable, I do not have that capacity. So all I can do is cry out to God, from the depths from my heart "Help us!!! Save us!!!" Cause we can't do it alone. We can't even do it in a group. We need God, because without him, we are stumbling, sniveling creatures, wandering around in the dark with no one to lead us or give us light. But with God, there is light, because he himself is our light. And through him, our light will rise in the darkness, and our night will become like the noonday. (Isaiah 58:10)

Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help and he will say: Here am I - Isaiah 58:8-9

And I've been fasting books and movies and the internet (with a few exceptions, obviously), and praying and reading my bible a lot more, talking to God. And it's been really good, really strengthening. And I found those verses last week, and was struck by the imagery of the light, and how hopeful that was, that we would become bearers of the light. I was struck by how amazing God is, and how much he love us. How much we need him to love us.